@toastymoe: Put me in your bio so I know it's real... Just kidding, I'd rather be in your will.
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@tweeterreader36: To the co-worker who had a 17 min conversation with me and didn't tell me I had a smudge on my forehead. It's on!!
@AlsBoy: Guys, don't let this headphones thing mislead you, women that aren't wearing them probably don't want to talk to you either
@jedfudally: childrens alphabet books are the only thing keeping us from forgetting what a xylophone is
@jjlob7: I don't need a personal trainer as much as I need someone to follow me around and slap unhealthy food out of my hands. :/