@TheAlexP: Rapunzel is my favorite story about a girl who would do anything to have her hair pulled.
@AngelaEhh: Shoutout to the kitchen knob that grabbed the strings on my pants and undid them.
@Reverend_Scott: Satan: "Waaazzz up?"
God: "Speak of the Devil."
God: "Sorry, figure of speech."
Satan: "Jesus Christ."
@NoChillPosts: TAKE IT EASY OUT THERE FELLAS
@briangaar: Sorry babe, you knew you were dating a bad boy [shuffles Pokemon cards without the plastic covers]
@MAngelo505: I'm Lactose Intolerant, which means I rarely find missing children.