@mysteryteacher: Really, IKEA? No free WiFi? Or do I have to buy one and assemble it?
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@ActualPerson084: FREE IPAD FOR ANSWERING A SIMPLE SURVEY. 1) WHERE DO YOU LIVE? 2) DO YOU OWN WEAPONS? 3) WHEN ARE YOU MOST VULNERABLE? #NIGHTOFTHEFREEIPAD
@Contwixt: Girl, are you a conspiracy theory? Because I want to listen to you all day long even though I find it hard to believe a word you say.
@MischievousJam: Today seems like the perfect day to make important life altering decisions! - Me, when I've gone two days without sleep
@rickygervais: I'm hoping the nuclear strike button & the trap-door for hecklers button on Trump's desk are completely different colours.