@bingowings14: Reduce your kids intake of sugary, fizzy drinks by shaking up the can before handing it to them.
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@SortaBad: Age 20: Gotta get ripped for Spring Break! Age 25: Exercise reduces stress! Age 35: My doctor says I'll die immediately if I don't do this
@markleggett: HOBBIES INCLUDE: - Whispering dark secrets to animals - Trying to get a strawberry seed out of my teeth - Being vegan, but also eating steak
@KateWhineHall: If I ever really want my kids' attention I can just make a YouTube video of me "unboxing" whatever I need to say.