@KamanCider: Remember kids, if a stranger offers you drugs, say thank you because drugs are expensive.
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@suntzufuntzu: "What if Waldo finds me first?" I ask naively. Grandma closes the book; the blood drains from her face. "Don't let that happen," she warns.
@ericsshadow: [me holding a door] PRETTY GIRL: [over her shoulder] thanks. ME: sorry, i'm married, but in time you'll get over me.
@fro_vo: presidents day is just a holiday created by "Big President" to get us to buy more presidents