@SarahMJade: Remember kids, you only burn in hell if you are religious.
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@djdarrellripley: Police Officer: You know, this is a one way street? Me: I was only going one way...
@mattr_in_nc: Contrary to popular belief, tigers do not holler if you catch them by the toe. Also, could someone call an ambulance?
@VestaTot: Help 9-1-1! I just found my husband! He's been drugged in his coffee and then stabbed with a pen knife but that didn't work and then shot!