@Marlebean: *renames my kids South and East, and leaves them on Kanye's doorstep*
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@Book_Krazy: *Arrives at work 2 hrs late Boss: HR wants to see you about your behavior Me: Well, I literally just got here so it couldn't have been me
@CheryeDavis: I'm perfectly fine with kissing frogs to find a prince...But I draw the line at kissing snakes.
@angibangie: The last time my heart beat this fast I was at my boyfriend's parent's house and the toilet water was rising... -My best pickup line