@ScottLinnen: Riding up in the elevator with a bunch of children. So much screaming & crying. You'd think one of them would ask me what the hell's wrong.
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@dreamthievin: Life plan: 1. Befriend shady people. 2. Witness a murder. 3. Enter witness protection & get new name. 4. So long student loans!
@Jay_FrickinLynn: Boyfriend calls me Gluteal Myalgia because he thinks I'm too dumb to understand what it means. Let's see how he likes the name Microphallus
@rolldiggity: 1. Put on clown shoes. 2. Sit in toilet stall with feet pulled up. 3. Wait for someone to enter other stall. 4. Slowly lower feet to floor