@MessJenkins: "Rock. Paper. Scissors." - terrible surgeon
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@TheRealNickKay: *LIGHTHOUSE* BATMAN - You call? L/HOUSE KEEPER - Shit, not again man. I am so sorry. BATMAN - Dead seagull on the light? LK -*Nods*
@KyleMcDowell86: [job interview] "What's your biggest weakness?" "My honesty" "I don't think-" "I broke into ur house and made love to ur cat last night"
@petfurniture: "why do women always take sooo long to put their makeup on?" because makeup is war paint for Being In Public, clearly