@MessJenkins: "Rock. Paper. Scissors." - terrible surgeon
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@KateQFunny: TIP: Always carry a motorcycle helmet with u. Then u never have to do your hair & u can blame it on safety & the law & stuff. #lifehacks
@Mickey_McCauley: Unfaithful Russian men come home to find all their stuff in a box in a box in a box in a box in a box in a box in a box on the sidewalk.
@KentWGraham: When I awoke from the car accident in a full bodycast, my wife was right at my bedside to let me know that childbirth is still more painful.
@gerryhallcomedy: If anyone on the street asks for directions - give directions to YOUR house. Then run home, put on music and wait for your new best friend!