@Deno_Tron: Roommate has date coming by later and asked me to clean bc he's not home. So I made a Princess D shrine in his room
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@Midgetspar: I'm glad that when you shoot, you shoot to kill ... because shooting to merely wound seems kinda mean.
@VaguelyFunnyDan: Had no idea why my salad was $175, 'til the waiter explained that they only use Beets by Dre.
@mean_crow: to the scum photoshopping bandanas on my wedding photos, STOP. my wife has a bad memory & is in tears, she thinks she married a bandana guy