@Twisted_Mettle: RUN FOREST!!! RUN!!! But the trees just stood there. Frozen with fear. In the end, the flames consumed them all.
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@XplodingUnicorn: Me: That guy is a bad apple. 6-year-old: He's a person. Me: I just meant he's mean. 6: Probably because you called him an apple.
@Donna_McCoy: My coworkers have such cute nicknames for me, like "The one who eats all the donuts" and "Don't tell her there's pizza in the kitchen".
@tealbluejay: Calm down penguins. You're just a flashy suit and a few body parts away from being a platypus.
@envydatropic: How long before your caterpillars will turn into butterflies? Me looking at your eyebrows