@TheMichaelRock: Sarcasm is like hitting someone in the face with a bat, but with words.
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@JohnsonDiaz21: A newly wed guy asked me about marriage. I told him it's sort of like a museum. You have to be quiet and you can't really touch anything.
@TwinSurvivalist: Home Alone is my favorite movie about the inevitable homicidal tendencies that come from prolonged neglect.
@JacknArisdad: You wouldn't believe me after reading my TL but my 1st language actually is English