@DumbConfessions: Saying "excape "makes me wanna stab you in the "exophagus".
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Hadzilla: At the last supper Jesus was probably like it would be way more comfortable for everyone if some of you sat on the other side of the table
@aveuaskew: "Your resume has MPGMA listed under hobbies. What exactly is that?" Making people guess the meaning of acronyms.
@Kathleen_McGee: The cool thing about being broke is you can tell your friends you aren't drinking for a while & they think you're getting your shit together
@BuckyIsotope: *stranded on island* *puts message in bottle and throws it into sea* *years later gets message back* what's updog? *fist pump*