@MensPictures: School be like
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@radtoria: Hello. I am Public Restroom. Would you like some toilet paper that melts in the palm of your hand? Here, have some empty soap, my child.
@Brianhopecomedy: If I close my eyes while my 3 year old pours her cereal I can hear the relaxing sound of thousands of Cheerios raining on the floor.
@Angrea: Someone just told me to "have a blessed day." What do you even say to someone like that? I just hissed at them.
@Shock_Monster: Me: That the new iPhone? Him: Yup! The 5S! Me: What's the difference? Him: The C stands for "Cheap" Me: What about the S? Him: "'Spensive"