@ucancallmejenn: Settle down, Levi's commercial. You are talking about pants.
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@NintenDom: I named my WiFi after my last girlfriend because it's never fully connected with me. And also because I caught my neighbour using it.
@JamieGreenlees: I don't hate you, but if you we're drowning, I would dive in and handcuff a piano to your neck.
@BucMarvin: Guinness Book of World Records should be in the Guinness Book of World Records as being the book with the most world records.
@Brentweets: Each one of us has a secret. My secret is that I can't keep a secret. Also Jill is a lesbian.