@sammyrhodes: Shaving your beard is a great way to remember what you looked like when you were 5.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Rollmaninoz: [at my funeral] *casket falls onto the floor* Mum: that's the quickest I've ever seen him move Dad: lol owned
@toomanytoes: "Endless shrimp" sounds nice until you realize they are serious. It's a threat. The shrimp will never stop.
@KimDotcom: "The problem with quotes on the Internet is that they're not always accurate." - Albert Einstein
@FatherWithTwins: My 5yo can't remember to take off his shirt before showering but he remembered that a month ago I said we'd go to the water park on Saturday