@Douchekevin: SHHHHH!!!!!!! I just got followed by a Jehovah Witness. All of you keep quiet and pretend we aren't home...
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@krisv_723: Fred realized too late that he should have bought a fresh sheet for his toga, when he walked into the black light party.
@FattMernandez: I don't honk at women because I don't let a girl know she's attractive with the same thing I use to scare ducks from in front of my car.
@iLikeCatShirts: Boxing is like a dance, a dance where you punch your dance partner until he doesn't want to dance anymore.