@curlymalloy: Shit, I just wasted a good corn dog, by eating It with no guys around.
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@2tickytacky: If your date asks what you do for a living, just say "You let me worry about that."
@Hobo_Splendido: The nephew I'm babysitting has been in a corn maze since Thursday, but I rationalize by thinking he has plenty to eat.
@ilovepie84: My neighbor once said he was as healthy as a horse. Today he broke his leg so I had to put him down.
@Pierre__4: If I was a girl my best friend would have to come untangle me at least twice a week because I tried to take my bra off through my sleeve