@MauriceBlitz: I hate reality shows. Like this one, for instance, called "The News."

@mommy_cusses: My husband coughing the moment I got the baby to sleep is why spouses are the number one suspect in homicide cases.

@TheToddWilliams: This forest scent air freshener is really working. Three elk have moved into my living room.

@Marlebean: Hubby took the kids downstairs and is letting me sleep in! I'm so excit..never mind, I hear crying already. I think it's my husband.

@Owl_Meat: The only Plato I care about is a big Plato spaghetti