@jeremiahtolbert: Slightly obscure nerd jokes are best nerd jokes.
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@HousewifeOfHell: Sooo romantic. He said I'm a work of art. Or a piece of work. Something like that.
@VerifiedDrunk: Jesus is all like eat my body, drink my blood and I'm all like dude, I only like you as a friend.
@ericsshadow: ATTORNEY: my client would like to confess ME: i sell human organs on the black market JUDGE [who needs a kidney transplant]: tell me more