@Halbeerz: So Nickelback is playing a flood relief concert for Alberta. Like those folks haven't suffered enough.
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@NinjaFuneral: Someone outside the grocery store asked me if I had a few seconds to save the environment. I feel like it would take longer than that...
@KKAlThani: An alarm clock that sends the person you like one of your deleted mirror pictures every time you hit the snooze button.
@kingsleyyy: Conservatives after a mass shooting: "You can't take our guns!" Conservatives after a police shooting: "But he had a gun!" I'm confused.