@Aspersioncast: So what do you pack for the end of the world? I'm thinking lots of toilet paper, oh and guns to protect my toilet paper.
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@sophxthompson: A little boy just screamed down the tube carriage “if you’re happy and you know it clap your hands” and everyone remained silent. I love London
@Rollmaninoz: Your password must contain a character still living in Game of Thrones ****** Password expired ****** Password expired ****** Password ex…
@LeBearGirdle: Me: hey famous actor Dwayne Johnson, why do they call you the rock? *Dwayne runs fulls speed at a pond and skips like 15 times* Me: OH MY
@dafloydsta: WIFE: You promised you'd take the dog out. ME: Okay, fine. [later] DOG: This is a really nice place. ME: *looking up from menu* What are you gonna have?