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@thatcarlygirl: "So, you're going that way? Cool. Me too."
@badbanana: There's no sticker warning me not to eat this box of nails so I guess I'll just go for it.
@ReeMURDA: I promise, I'm only gonna have 2 beers tonight.... 2 beers in dog beers
@discountzen: I told my husband that instead of leaving his dirty dishes on the counter, he should leave them in 1952 so a nice housewife cleans them up.
@Jennifergr8: God I hate kids.
And stuff that's alive.
And stuff that's dead.
I hate stuff.
I like cheese.
@Home_Halfway: People who argue Hillary is crooked; boy have I got news for you on the rest of the government