@JohnDuffy21: Social networking has become a club. Twitter is the dance floor. Instagram is the bar and Facebook is the people crying in the bathroom.
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@CoopSoSarc: I hung a horseshoe above the door for goodluck. My wife still came home. Superstitions are stupid.
@KeetPotato: lawyer: "my client claims the altercation began because - and i quote - "he came at me sideways" crab: "in my defence.."
@secondofhername: OMG THIS IS SUCH A SURPRISE THE THOUGHT OF WINNING AFTER A NOMINATION IS A PHENOMENA THAT BLOWS MY MIND HOW DID IT HAPPEN - All Emmy winners
@SteveSuckington: How dare you call me naive! I'd sue you for slander if I hadn't sent all my money to that Nigerian prince.