@jjhartinger: Some of you are acting like you got off a flight from Australia instead of losing one hour.
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@MrFornicator: When people ask me if I'm working hard or hardly working, I like to stab them with a pen and ask if they're hurting hard or hardly hurting.
@minnie_in_pink7: I hope George Clooney dumps his wife so he and Brad Pitt can finally be happy together.
@katiefzack: I dress like a murderer when I walk through the sketchy park outside my dorm so murderers will be like "Oh she's cool she's one of us."