@SucculentPizza: Somebody in my gang is an undercover police horse. I've narrowed it down to Dave, Kyle and Sugarcube
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@dafloydsta: [dropping kids off at school] ME: Ok, learn a lot today KIDS: But school doesn't start for another week ME: *speeding off* GOOD LUCK
@mackswift: Ladies, not every guy who talks to you wants to bang you. Some of us know that you have snacks in your purse.
@CornOnTheGoblin: ? Hey there Delilah, what's it like when u go grazing I know u said you're not a cow but girl this milk sure tastes amazing Did u just moo ?