@thatdutchperson: Someone rang my doorbell twice this morning, so I guess I'm having lunch behind the couch.
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@TheNardvark: Life is like a box of chocolates. People repeating the same movie quotes over and over until words have no meaning peanut tambourine ocelot
@BackrowSeats: This woman at the bar said "move, you're blocking the door" & I'm like strange pickup line but sure here's my number.
@AlottaInfo: And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the world. Then made the earth round... and laughed...