@goonxiety: Someone's only cute till they leave one of your texts on read.
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@glenc217: Okay, autocorrect, I get it. Every time I start to type "unattached", you suggest "unattractive". Message received.
@QwertyJones3: This florist doesn't even know anything about floors, and he's acting like I'm the stupid one!
@Brampersandon_: [chiropractor] Dr., your client Tony is here -Tony? The guy whose skin is made of bubble wrap Yes -Oh hell yes clear the rest of my schedule