@SaddestTiger: sometimes i call watermelons summer pumpkins and nobody ever knows what im talking about.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Ristolable: My friend and I were talking about food and he said "I'm not a big Chinese guy" and I was like "I know you're not"
@kirbys4losers: Of course you don't know 'our song.' You didn't know we were even dating, silly. Or that the girl you had lunch with is in my trunk.
@TheWeirdWorld: If you attempt to rob a bank you won’t have any trouble with rent/food bills for the next 10 years whether you are successful or not.
@HatfieldAnne: A brightly-colored van drives slowly down our street. Kids gather excitedly. It is the Edible Arrangements truck. We are all betrayed.