@Kendragarden: Sometimes I like to freak my husband out by asking where this relationship is going.
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@TraylorParker: Once I burned my Trailer down when I left a candle burning after a romantic date. To keep my street cred, I claimed it was a meth explosion.
@Vodkantots: People who are genuinely surprised when politicians behave badly should be forced to wear helmets for their own protection.
@TheAlexNevil: Judge: How do you find the defendant? Jury Foreman: Well...I guess I just look right at him. Why -- isn't that how you do it?