@JosesLovesYou: Sometimes I loiter outside of Victoria's Secret just so people think I have a girlfriend.
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@JohnCleese: Hotel Security just knocked on my door to deliver a package. He asked for indentification. I showed him my book,with my name and face on it
@thedayofthedot: there is nothing wrong with being nice, but there is something wrong with being nice to people.
@Brianhopecomedy: "Dadd-" "No." "You don't even know what I was going to say!" "You're wearing your Superman costume and standing beside the ladder. No."