@Parentpains: Sometimes I'll tell my wife the car is making a weird noise and I need to listen just so I don't have to hear her talk.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@simoncholland: I accidentally called it an eternity scarf instead of an infinity scarf and now I have to drink my Starbucks outside.
@SarcasticAlly12: My 5 yo after I explained the concept of breastfeeding: "can you squeeze Capri Suns outta those things or just milk?"
@AbbyHasIssues: *Showing me a picture of your baby* Me: Is that a dog toy in the background? What kind of dog do you have? What's your dog's name?
@ShutUpThatsWho: [God making water] "it helps plants" ANGEL: nice "cleans things" A: ok "u die if u don't drink it" A: "& drown if u drink it wrong" A: what