@KimmyMonte: Sometimes, late at night, I'll look up at the stars and wonder if you're also stealing lawn furniture.
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@bea_ker: [date slides her top down her shoulder to show me a scar] I got this surfing [I show her my grotesque balls] I was born like this I think
@WhaJoTalkinBout: Her: What's your favorite part about being a stay-at-home mom? Me: Showering is optional Her: HAHAHA, be serious. Me: Ok, no drug tests.