@sarcasticmommy4: Sometimes passing by a nursing home is the only reminder I need to go buy my kids whatever they want.
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@stephenjmolloy: Me: I'm not going to drink in 2017 *in hospital 3 days later* Doctor: You have to drink water you idiot
@GoldenSpirals: The last thing I remember was my Mom telling me to "Take Care". I did, and now Liam Neeson is chasing me.
@bobvulfov: [magic school bus] KID: where are we going today MS. FRIZZLE: the zoo KID: but last week we went to SPACE MS. FRIZZLE: im hungover, children