@Midgetspar: Sorry I'm late. My dog ate my car.
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@Rainbowbunee: Opened the bathroom cupboard and a bunch of feminine hygiene products fell out on me. It was a tampede.
@StellaRtwot: Learning how to break wooden boards in karate is important in case you ever get in a fight with a house.
@Matt_The_1st: Me: But where do you see this relationship in five years? Her: Sir! For the last time, do you want extra cheese or not?