@primawesome: Sorry I'm late, there was a dad yelling at his teenage son for buying $90 jeans and I had to hear every word of it.
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@Smooheed: Stop screaming! I thought you'd appreciate having someone to pass you a towel when you got out of the shower
@aSapCoolDad: *shows up to marathon with perfect hair* Yeah I've been conditioning a lot for this race
@Cheeseboy22: Remember, when you're driving in the snow, it's important to speed up and go as fast as you can so you don't get stuck.
@bazecraze: People used to dress as monsters for Halloween. Now they dress as characters from shows you don't watch.