@briancthayer: Spiders were super disappointed when they finally saw the world wide web.
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@Fingers_of_Fury: You're like that person playing Pictionary who draws something terribly and just keeps circling it.
@LackOfShame: Brain: What day of the week did the 1st calendar day ever fall on? Do the math! Me: Seriously?! It's 2AM and I'm leading a meeting tomorrow
@Miniwheats2012: Me: Wake up son! Son: Just 30 more minutes please Me: I'm borrowing your phone Son jumps of the bed: I'm awake!