@StashTheTash: SPOILER ALERT: Rice cakes do not contain any actual cake.
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@amazymay72x: sure mugger, run away with my purse holding half used lipstick, 1 tampon, maxed out credit cards n negative bank card. whos laughing now?
@duumb: [kidnapper asking for ransom] pay by 6 pm or i start sending u his fingers [gf trying to unlock my phone] can u start with his right thumb
@Marlebean: I bring my kids to a romantic restaurant on Valentine's day as a birth control reminder to the other couples.