@joeldanger: Squirrels are just rats who blow dry their tails.
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@ninjadinosaur1: None of my Barbies are speaking to each other because Ken got Skipper pregnant again. You can imagine the tension in my house tonight.
@squirrel74wkgn: [playing guitar in hotel lounge] Me: *puts out cigarette* Any more requests out there tonight? Front desk: Yes. Would you please get out of the lobby?