@Stella1070: Started the mower for the 1st time this year.36 pulls & then I passed out.When I came to, yard had crop circles & the beagle had a mohawk.
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@murrman5: [in a meeting] ok a Dracula movie except he's new in town and biting is illegal but he befriends the pastors daught- "that's just Footloose"
@WVUPRT: Girl at engineering school: I'm like the single-most clumsy person [5 male engineering students emerge from bushes] "Did you say single?"
@TheAlexNevil: *gets bitten by a radioactive bear *before developing super powers, gets eaten by radioactive bear