@robotrowboat: Starting to think that adult supervision is a myth. In fact, my eyes seem to be getting worse.
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@hasht4g: If Pringles really wanted the fun to never stop they'd make those tube things like 5 feet long.
@clindsaysway: Cat doesn't realize if he succeeds in tripping me on the way downstairs to feed him, we all die.
@leahlovescheez: Why do I have to answer security questions to pay my bills? Ohmygod please tell me there are hackers out there trying to pay my bills....
@GrantTanaka: at my funeral, I need one of you to stand up and ask if you can have your toaster back