@lilgapeach30: Stepped on an action figure in the shower and simultaneously invented six new cuss words in four different languages.
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@AnitaHelmet: I just want to apologize to all the guys I dated BEFORE I started using Prozac. And to their wives. And their local fire departments.
@MoosePunch: "Ow that dog just nipped at me" PEE ON IT! "No man NO STOP THAT DOESN'T WORK FOR EVERYTHING" I'M HERE FOR YA BUDDY!
@ShawnHatosy: If honey is supposed to be so great for your voice, why does it sound like Winnie the Pooh has been shotgunning bleach?