@Jandalize: Stop calling it "sweater weather" and call it what it really is, "I don't have to shave my legs for 6 months weather."
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@Tups13: The stoners surround me very, very slowly. Three of them are eating cereal. "Look guys," I explain. "When I said I had a pot belly..."
@WittySassBasket: I like to finish my pelvic exam by asking the doctor 'hey, where'd your watch go?'
@StephJoLanders: We are teaching children there is no "i" in team, but it's way more important to teach them there's no "a" in definitely.
@AsgardianRose: You know how people play video games by pushing all the buttons at once? That's how I'm handling adulthood.