@Jandalize: Stop calling it "sweater weather" and call it what it really is, "I don't have to shave my legs for 6 months weather."
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@Underchilde: Some people have hauntingly good looks. Not you though, you’re just really scary looking.
@dshack8: My dog reacts to the vacuum cleaner the same way I react when my wife says "We need to talk".
@samalmightysam: If you receive an e-mail that says: ''FREE JUSTIN BIEBER CONCERT TICKETS'' Don't open it! It may contain free Justin Bieber concert tickets.
@SteveInevitable: When I'm looking for a parking spot I turn the radio down because clearly I can see better when it's quieter...