@Smooheed: Stop screaming! I thought you'd appreciate having someone to pass you a towel when you got out of the shower
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@GashleyMadison: Coworker: What would be your ideal- Me: Sleeping CW: But you didn't let me finish my- M: My answer is always sleeping.
@karlainvt: It's so cute how my kids think I'm going to go look for them after I finish counting to ten.
@01CandyQueen: Bae: come over Me: do you have food? Bae: my parents aren't home Me: Are they gonna come back with food?