@shariv67: Surfing is a good choice for people who like skateboarding but wish it had more sharks.
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@girl_a_whirl: [Catholic church] *priest hands out "What To Expect At Your Exorcism" Husband: Babe, this isn't counseling Me: You said you'd try anything
@StinkyGr33n: Boss to our group: "Let's talk about what inspires you. Mike, you go first." Me: *Goes home*
@MrsTomServo: *scampers over to ice cream truck* Yes, I'll take the SpongeBob who looks like he just opened the Ark of the Covenant, please.
@AngelaEhh: My tall sister took the vodka out of the cupboards above the fridge. I always thought those doors were just there for decoration.