@senorwinces: Take a look at trending topics and you'll realize why they have to write "do not eat" on dry silica packets.
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@heroinsdemise: "Removing my make up" Or how I like to call it: "Reset face to factory settings"
@BeCoco77: True Story: A guy at the supermarket walked up to me today and asked me if I was on twitter. I said no. If you're reading this, I lied.
@Pundamentalism: Ha - mildly amusing Haha - funny Hahaha - sarcastic laugh Hahahaha - stayin' alive
@omerwahaj: What's the name of that movie with that actor in which the guy does that thing with that other thing in that place during that time?