@ch000ch: take me to the middle of the desert and just leave me there
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@AbbyHasIssues: (Grabs store intercom) Would whoever dropped the list with “pizza” and “wine” on it in the cart come to the front? We need to be friends.
@Reverend_Scott: "SOMEONE IS VAPING" 911: Stay calm, were tracing it "HURRY" 911: THE VAPING IS COMIN FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE "OMG" 911: GET OUT GET OUT
@JCWisdomNuggets: Server: Want one of our famous milkshakes? Me: Well, I saw your yard and it was empty. Server: Huh? Me: No boys. Server: Huh? Me: No thanks.
@jonnysun: *stares at phone* why cant i sleep *puts phone face-up on bed, the screen brigtness bathes my room in a light mor powerfubl than the sun* oh