@ZWindsor_: Teacher- "How much is a gram?" Me- "Depends on what you want" Teacher- "Out, just get out"
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@XplodingUnicorn: Me: What's the first step of fire safety? 4-year-old: Stay away from dragons. Me: 4: Me: Well, obviously.
@Zambah_: Time zones are amazing! Here in New Zealand it's tomorrow, in America it's yesterday and in North Korea it's 1980.
@UncleDuke1969: Laugh, and the world laughs with you... Keep saying "LOL" out loud, and you'll die alone. (For Judy in Accounting)