@funnyordie: Teamwork makes the dream work.
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@R0ckG0d88: My dog can't hear me when I yell at him to stop chewing on my flip flop but he can hear the crinkle of the Dorito bag from 3 counties over.
@WheelTod: I'd been using my new hand-mirror for over 6 months before I realized it was actually a framed stock photo of a much less handsome man.
@thepunningman: Police: Cover me Rookie: ok [pulls out guitar] Every little thing she does is magic