@KoKeniSasquatch: Teenagers. Can't live with them. Can't get rid of them without bringing the cops around.
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@meganamram: Edison stole the idea for the lightbulb from the lightbulb that appeared above his head when he got the idea for the phonograph
@WoodyLuvsCoffee: Someone in the office keeps making decaf coffee & I've narrowed it down to that guy who never gets anything done.
@Xalqee: When are we gonna admit that those tools we keep by the fireplace are just for killing people?
@thatUPSdude: Turns out if you fake a heart attack every Monday work sends you to HR and not the hospital.